First of all I’d like to say hello, I haven’t written an article in a while, and to be honest I have no real reason for it. Second, what is up with this new editor? Everything looks different and I’m scared. Anyways, Risk of Rain is a game that came out in 2013 and Risk… Continue reading Risk of Rain? More Like Risk of Rain 2
It’s Been Exactly One Year Since I Tried To Order a Fortnite Burger
For the record, the hill I will plant my flag and die on is that Raising Canes is the only fast food chicken that matters. A weird hill to die on, I know, but at least I’m dead.
When the Sun Opens
When the Sun Opens I was told a lie growing up. It was one of those lies that was, at its very core, entirely harmless, especially when it was fed to the over-imaginative brain of a child. Of course, harm is hardly a dualistic thing. There’s a sliding scale involved, because the world is… Continue reading When the Sun Opens
The Space Device Premise and the Certain Promise of Our Inevitable Demise
Well… it’s been a while since I’ve visited this series. I know you’ve all be very eager to see how I wrap it up. The twists and turns we’ve been through…how it all ties together. We could go anywhere basically. A long time ago, approximately 2017, I had a vision for the end of this… Continue reading The Space Device Premise and the Certain Promise of Our Inevitable Demise
Homestuck – The Epilogue
It’s been 10 years since Homestuck started, and 3 years since Homestuck ended. I’ve reviewed Homestuck, I’ve even reviewed the Homestuck spin-off game Hiveswap. I haven’t reviewed Friendsim, which is a “not-dating” sim based on Hiveswap, but I will right now – it’s fucking shit. One of the writers tried to sneak diaper fetish porn… Continue reading Homestuck – The Epilogue
The Top 5 Ways That Bernie Can Still Win.
I’ve been playing a lot of Age of Empires 2 lately. If you’re one of the few people who still reads my columns on this site, you’d probably be just a little upset if I didn’t make a joke that went something like “If you’re the kind of idiot who would ask yourself ‘Coach, what… Continue reading The Top 5 Ways That Bernie Can Still Win.
My 2018 In Video Games
Because I lack any humor I once had, I don’t want to do elaborate awards this year. Instead, I’ll give my thoughts on some games I explored or rediscovered this year. At the end, I comment about some things potentially coming in 2019. The Alliance Alive The little 3DS is so proud of its success,… Continue reading My 2018 In Video Games
Tsugunai – Atonement
Think about your favorite town in a JRPG. Anyone who’s played a JRPG has a favorite, and usually a different one from everyone else. Why you like the town varies: maybe it’s from one of the first games you’ve played, or it reminds you of your home town, you really like the setting or stories,… Continue reading Tsugunai – Atonement
You Can Hear The People Shouting
Have you ever heard a joke that was so funny you wish you could hear it a thousand times? A quip, a phrase, an anecdote, anything – not necessarily for the first time either – that simply appreciates in value the more and more you hear it? Do you wish that there was a way… Continue reading You Can Hear The People Shouting
I don’t like Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
In all my game reviews, especially recently, I’ve recommended, discussed, and hopefully analyzed a lot of games that I like. Those are games I like because they’re charming, deserve more popularity, have interesting design, or I just think they’re special. Writing an article about a game I dislike is a completely different angle, and feels… Continue reading I don’t like Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
Spider-Man (PS4)
A loud ding can be heard off in the distance. The source: your mom’s brand new 2004 GE oven and stove top combo priced at $350 in the sears catalog. This chime is like a sweet symphony to your ears as it heralds in an era of unadulterated greasy goodness. That’s right, it’s pizza time.… Continue reading Spider-Man (PS4)
Uplink
Seemingly the entire PC simulation game genre has a tendency to give the player immediate head-first immersion. That immersion is in both senses of the word: complete theming of all audio/visual elements of the game, and complete detachment from guiding the player, forcing them to make mistakes and learn from them. Uplink, a 2001 game… Continue reading Uplink